Friday, May 21, 2010

Capitulation


Though he can no longer dress himself this birthday
he can still swallow the 80 proof Dewar’s
and purse his lips at the bite, like he used to.

Then, he would be sitting poolside, his pale
linen pants reflected in her wide Diors,
fondling the dog’s creamy ears, the record player
turning out Rudy Vallee or Tommy Dorsey
maybe doffing his brimmed hat to
slide back his hair with his palm, all the time
tapping his pointed buck to the pulse,
guests murmuring, laughing off beat.

Now, a glitch in his brain
has left him crumpled on one side, still sapient
but with his former elegance extinguished by the gaudy patterned
robe he wears emblazoned with logos of a sport's team
he doesn’t recognize. Someone has draped it
over his shoulders like a Medieval caparison, allowing
its slack to catch in the metal wheels which scratch the linoleum
leading everywhere and nowhere, here.

Futile to protest, he lifts his arm and lets the cool sharp
tincture slide between his teeth and warm his throat,
grateful for the weight of the glass and its smuggled contents

and celebrates another year.


This poem was written to a “wordle” prompt on a poetry website called “Big Tent Poetry” found here:  http://bigtentpoetry.org/

The words provided in the prompt were:  capitulate, proof, purse, fondle, doff, glitch, crumple, sapient, caparison, pattern, futile, tincture.  I confess I had to look up the meaning of a few of these words.

13 comments:

  1. This is absolutely amazing! I love the way you have used the all words, no easy feat. "draped it over his shoulders like a Medieval caparison" is sheer brilliance! I hope everyone who takes part in this prompt will find and read your poem!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thank you, Marianne. It is sometimes awkward to try to fit them all in, but for some reason i want to get them ALL.

    ReplyDelete
  3. This is beautifully written Marie, and this is poignant 'a glitch in his brain has left him crumpled on one side'.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Wow! Excellent poem. I can visualize this from inside and outside this character.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Really colorful and engaging! We learn a lot about him between sips. I like all of the proper names, particularly the D's: Dewar's, Dior, and Dorsey, and "grateful for the weight of the glass."

    ReplyDelete
  6. The narrative held all those words incredibly well! What a coup.

    In addition to deft use of those words, I appreciate the endless linoleum, which does a great job of showing (or rather reinforcing) the "lesser" aesthetic scene he finds himself in.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Wonderful to weave those words into a scene with which we can all identify, all too readily. We can appreciate, with him, the pleasure of that smuggled tincture. And Deb is right about the linoleum!

    ReplyDelete
  8. I want to fondle that dog's ears, too...for some reason, your character reminded me of The Great Gatsby! Great job.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Such a great narrative, and though it's a bit sad (love the way you describe his stroke), I like the bit of defiance in that smuggled shot.

    ReplyDelete
  10. This is so sad. And so true for so many. I had to wipe a few tears thinking of who he WAS & who he IS. A chill runs down my spine...

    ReplyDelete
  11. Poignant piece. So well written it feels more personal than words. Touching.

    ReplyDelete
  12. it is like peering through an opened door, left unattended and as you slowly time warp pass you see, really see this man.. the body is a cruel task master...

    ReplyDelete
  13. Fantastic, not only the craft, but the narrative. My hat's off. I don't do the wordle thing. Too hodge-podgy for me.

    ReplyDelete